Thursday, October 29, 2015

THE FLIRTING BOOK - An Ongoing Review

We're gonna have a little fun on Filthy Casket with an ongoing review of this book that is supposed to help you flirt better. 

I'd never, ever buy this kind of book without prompting. I don't think there's anything wrong with it, but I'd be too fake-confident to purchase it myself. But the world is funny and one day several of us were at the house of someone who was getting rid of old books. She'd hold up a book and one of us would claim it (me, an aunt, and several cousins). Well, she held up How to Attract Anyone, Anytime, Anyplace: The Smart Guide to Flirting and all of the voices sans mine shouted, "Charlotte!"

These motherfuckers.

At first I got a wee bit defensive. Just because I'm single doesn't mean I don't know how to flirt! I know how to flirt! I just don't engage in flirtation while I'm with a bunch of people, especially if it's family! I was mighty close to rejecting the book and insisting the fifteen year old would make better use of it when... 

I remembered that time in college when I was walking into the campus center and a handsome fella happened to be walking through the doors at the same time. I unintentionally but definitely audibly said, "You are scrumptious!" Commence a lot of internal "no no no no no no no." Not one of my finest moments, which is saying something, my friends. 

So with that memory suddenly fresh in my mind I shut my mouth and threw the book on top of my pile.

I picked it up once or twice but never really read it. I have no interest in starting a relationship here, since I'm going back to New York. There's one guy here who is very charming and if I have to endure even one more "Yes, ma'am" or "You look real pretty today" in his southern accent I might actually die because I know I can't pack him in my suitcase and take him up north with me. Le sigh. Knowing all that, I still think it'll be fun to read the book and try out some of the advice (not on the aforementioned farmer because again, it might cause my literal death). I normally hold back on flirting unless I already start to like a guy, but now that we're reviewing the book I've got to think about the greater good! I've got to flirt!* Think of all the people who might benefit! 

There are seven chapters and I think I'll probably do one post each week, so this will last for about two months. I'm not trying this to get a boyfriend. I just think it'll be fun and, always more importantly, funny. Maybe it'll even change some of my communication habits right in time for my return to NY. Who knows. From what I've seen so far, this book sounds super corny. I suppose that's to be expected. 

A quick glance at the table of contents tells me I'll be rediscovering the flirt in me. And by that I just have to assume she means *discovering for the first time. 

See you in a week. 


Chapter 1's post here
Chapter 2's post here
Chapter 3's post here

No comments:

Post a Comment